molif | en

Among some of the best movies I’ve seen lately, there is one that I cannot simply watch & forget.
The first time I saw it, I didn’t know what to expect, at all.
Without checking imdb, almost all the time I was expecting for some deep drama to develop on the screen. And I was almost angry to every little detail that was not true from historic point of view or was too forced.
But somewhere around the half of the movie I realized that what you need to do is to get relaxed and watch it with one and only purpose: to enjoy it. To feel the real audio-visual satisfaction that it provides – with great music, stunning cinematography and amazing actors.

All the actors in this movie are simply wonderful – the young as the older ones. The seem not to act, but to live they roles.
Here you can enjoy two short music pieces from this movie:

“Stilyagi” deserves to be seen.
It’s a music movie, but not exactly musical. There’s difference, you know.
But the influence it gives over all your senses is huge – the bright scenes and characters will probably haunt your head for days.

Oh, and there’s this impressive site for the movie.
You need to know Russian, and thus you’ll learn more facts about the story and the characters, as the movie is based on a book.

But what left me speechless after watching the movie, was the soft and good-nature attitude towards the past times.
You can feel the nostalgia, but you cannot find disturbing things like hate or denial.
The end is also very unexpected.
When the movie is over, you can find yourself irresistibly drawn to dance – and to feel young, alive, colorful.

Every little piece of fabric could become alive. It only needs some imagination.
I was always very fond of handmade toys.
On places like etsy.com one can find amazing things – and of course, not only toys.
I am warning the novices there – you could spend days browsing.

Here I can show you one I’ve made, who even doesn’t know what kind of creature is:

And another rabbit. This one is particularly proud with his big ears, able to bend different ways when he is moody.
What’s left to say about his belt buckle? A rare vintage one.

Here they are, standing gently for a family portrait, together with the last year’s mouse.

Oh, and what about this cat? You probably think now “But we’ve already seen this guy”? Well, not really. This one is the almost-twin-brother of Alfons, and the difference between two of them are the bigger eyes on this one and his age – a week later he came. He is also very unsuspecting and ingenuous. I’ve made him especially as a gift to my mother, because every time when she sees me making something from fabric or clay, she ask with a very innocent voice: “And for whom are you making this now?”

I even don’t know how she named him, but I will surely ask.

Four years ago Michel happened to be sick like recently.
Actually, it was more serious then. Few times during the year he fell for more than a week with 40 degrees C temperature.
And nothing could help him, so finally we called for some alternative.
On the stage appeared this sumo hare, dedicated to scare the flu virus and to help Michel get well soon.

First times it was a success. That made him an honored member of the little hand-made society on my shelf.
Then it seemed like the flu got resistant to hare power, so we’ve changed the tactics and decided to visualize our dream little house.
Made with all our love and wish for good health and many more miles together on our bikes, here it is:

My man got well finally, just in time for his own wedding. Then… then we made thousands of miles together and it is very possible that we won’t stop.
The house? It still illuminates our evenings.

As much as I love to draw, I cannot resist making things from clay and from fabric.
I guess that all of the girls in high school today will laugh at the fact that when I was a teenager, still loved to play with dolls and toys I was often making clothes or houses for them.
Of course, it was partly because of the fact that there were many kids around me – and then it seemed to me that I was made to care and entertain relatives’ and friends’ children.
Don’t get me wrong: most of the time I was doing this gladly, and kids are good excuse for these games.
We’ve had many joyful days and I still love to dwell in the world of fantasy and toys.
My parents are also creative people and they influenced me a lot.
There is still somewhere in the attic an old puppet theater. My father once started to make it as a gift to my mother, but it ended not finished.
Sometimes I remember about it and I want to finish it together with Dad, but it seems that every time is not “the right moment”.
Maybe I don’t want to go too far from the childhood, as I enjoy making toys even today.

Let me introduce you to some that I still keep.
Here it is one of the very first I’ve made – it’s almost 13-14 years-old, I believe:

At that time I was drawing constantly, even applied for a school of Fine Arts. I intended to study Metal & Plastic Arts, but I couldn’t pass the first exam (graphics) and I didn’t go to the second one with the clay modeling, where I was sure I could be way better at.
Anyway, even today this little bear is keeping well the leftovers of my once huge collection of pencils. Some of them are so short now, you cannot even see them.

And what about this little piggy that we have here? Well, this guy also has a story to tell. He was made together with another one, and the other went as a present to a friend’s baby.

This one stayed at home as I considered it not so successful, but lately I found him and improved it a bit by adding the smile and the pants.

There will be a sequel.

There is something strange about all these cats in my works.
In fact, if you say that I probably like cats than dogs, it won’t be fair and right.
I was a cat owner for eleven years, but dog owner for much more.
For my long-lived and unforgettable friend Sheila I have written here before, and Lovejoy is still alive and kicking and lives with my parents and my brother.
Let me not even remind myself of Frodo, who was one of a kind and who left both of us with Michel inconsolable (Michel promised to write the whole story one day, when his heart lets him do it).
I love all kind of animals, of course. But this way or another, somehow cats are coming out more often under my fingers – and that’s a fact.

Well, this one is really special.
I drew it two days ago, when I was in need of something specific and engaging for the front side of my own business cards.
How could I miss the chance to show it off the the whole Internet?
Do you like it?
At least I know I do!

I remember the times when every free minute meant for us to grab the bikes and go on traveling adventures outside Sofia.
Nice, but didn’t happen for a long time. Michel is still ill, and this is going on for more than ten days.
Even Batman himself couldn’t help in this case, despite sending to us all week his own branded lemons:

From solidarity I am at home too, saving the people around from the flu virus, so all I can do is looking around and finding old and new things that could show in my blog. Like this greeting, good for Twitter-fans:

Here is another one, much smaller, made with some help from one little two-years-and-a half-old fairy:

Nia seems to draw far better than me, actually.
Don’t believe me?
Well, judge by yourselves:

I think she’s very good. Maybe one day she’ll laugh on this picture, but I like it and I wish her to develop a good skill.

I am at home right now. Browsing a fat folder with pictures, called “to-blog”. Sigh.
Because all the things I want to show, are not pictured properly.
The lack of sunny light in our little apartment is doing big injustice to them.
Alas, this place looks North, so the photos rarely comes the way they should.
Only in the late summer we have few warm sun rays, touching the edge of the windows.
Despite all, I decide that is better to show bad photos than none at all.

I love things, made so simple, but with original idea and deep thought behind it.
For example, here is this nice little fellow: it was a friendly gift from Nixo and it warms my heart.
Just by staying on the shelf and smiling to me every day:

It seems to be saying: “Come on, let’s draw, what are you waiting for?” …

I just left my job as an editor-in-chief of the Bulgarian .net magazine (it’s a localized version under the license of the .net magazine, UK). And because I don’t want this text to misinterpreted in any way, let me say that Future Publishing are not involved in this story and all that happened is between me and my Bulgarian publisher.

I started this job (which was a big challenge for me) with eagerness and passion and I know I did my best.

The first issue was a crazy story; it was done in less than four weeks and with the possible minimum of resources. But it was accepted very well by its audience of Bulgarian designers & developers, and so started for me the period of ten months of sleepless nights.

Eleven issues. 5 of them made without the proper help of an assistant-editor and the first three made even without the help of a proof-reader. I constantly worked online with the print designer, who was a freelancer; we also had to work together personally many nights, just before going to print. For months I answered to all e-mails, sent to us by our readers, I took interviews and I was constantly searching (online and offline) for contributors for the magazine. And if you think that “editor-in-chief” is just some kind of a good business card decoration — it is not.

I will always remember many fun situations, like the one when in a frenzy just before going to print we realized that there’s an illustration we don’t have the right to use. Then I made a quick sketch and it went to print. The good side was that nobody complained about this particular illustration.

Every issue was a product of hard work, and I am very well aware that they are not perfect, but at least they were made with love. Lots of love!

It’s a long and painful story for me to tell, and I will spare you most of the details. The main reason for my sudden leaving could be generalized with these terms (usually associated with divorcing couples): “insurmountable differences of personalities”. In this case — differences between the editor-in-chief and the publisher.

Hundreds of times I tried to sit down and to write about it, but I just couldn’t find the right words.

There were many things that could probably turn out better, but they didn’t. I know it’s partly because of my naiveté.

Like I said once, if you do a job with all of your heart, you take the risk to have it broken, but anyhow, it’s the only way I know how to live and work.

When I give my word that I will do something, I am much too devoted to the achieving of the best possible results.
It’s fair to be said that I always keep my word.
The worst sin of mine is probably that I am over-credulous.

I gave a credit of trust to a person who showed me from the very beginning that it can’t be trusted.

What were the chances that one day it will let me down? Huuuge.

And when it happened, I couldn’t even believe it.

So, I am writing this as a warning to other people like me:

Please, don’t make the same mistake.

Don’t focus all your life on work, no matter how attractive it is and how much it seems to give you satisfaction.

Indeed, working as an editor for .net Bulgaria was in many ways a wonderful job.

It was high lath and I jumped it.

The amount of effort I have invested was not remunerated accordingly, but I took this job because I liked the magazine very much and so I worked hard 28 days every month for it to happen.
I had to read and re-read the magazine at least three times on screen before going to print, and this means reading and editing over 300 thousand characters, and it was more than enough strain for my eyes and for my back (which now troubles me seriously).
Despite this, everything concerning .net also gave me the very satisfying feeling that I can do bigger things than I have previously thought I am able to, and so I still feel it as a big personal success.

But as an employee, I failed. I admit that I failed mainly to defend my rights, relying very foolishly on false promises and beautiful words.

I wish a wonderful future to .net Bulgaria, because there is no parent who would wish ill to his child. But I also remind myself to be very, very careful next time, when I give my trust to someone.
Even if for a good cause.

The moral of this story is that you cannot be misused, unless you let yourself be.

A door is closed, but many others are waiting to be opened, and I am happy that I can step up on a new path in my life.

P.S. This job gave me the opportunity to meet and work with unique people.
I want to say thanks especially to Dan Oliver — my English counterpart, and to all of the people who helped .net Bulgaria without receiving anything in return.
Don’t want to mention all of you name by name, for I am afraid I can miss somebody.
I am most happy to know all of you and I will be always grateful for the chance to work with you.
I owe many of you more than one beer.
(Without forgetting my dear husband, who supported me all the time, even when part of the price for this was neglecting our personal life).

A friend of mine asked me lately if I can draw one of those little creatures – tarsiers.
I promised to try and I start looking for a model in Google Images.
That’s how I found Darlene Sanguenza’s blog – she’s a designer and illustrator from Philippines (where some of these little creatures live).
There are plenty of wonderful and inspirational things on the site of Darlene.
You can see her illustration, used by me as a reference.

And here is what came out from me:

Sure, it needs a lot more attention, but I like it enough for a first try.